When I was younger, I jokingly referred to myself, more than once, as The King of Indecision.
I spent a lot of my 20s and 30s being indecisive. I would stall, delay, and avoid choices and decisions frequently. Why? Because I didn’t want to make the wrong one.
When I started college, I did so without choosing a major. At orientation, I joked with my dad that I intended to major in procrastination and hesitation with a minor in bureaucratic red tape.
However, before registering for classes, we incoming Freshmen were told that to get what we wanted, we had to move fast. The last in line at the assigned advisor was likely to need to rely on 2 ndor 3 rdclass choices.
That morning, I abdicated my throne as King of Indecision and was 2 ndin line with my advisor. I was signed up for classes — all my first choices — by 9am. This was somewhat to my dad’s chagrin — taking me at my word, he’d been getting ready to go play a round of golf.
The lesson I should have learned from this was that by being persistent you could get what you wanted. But I didn’t make that connection. I instead proceeded to half-ass, half-decide, half-live my life for the next 20 years or so.
After yet another failed job, and another failed relationship, I paused and paid attention. What wasn’t I doing?
The answer was persistence. But before I could be persistent in any given practice — I needed to be more decisive.
Choices and decisions pave your way
I started writing when I was 9. My first love was sci-fi. Then I also fell in love with fantasy. I wrote in fits and spurts for years — but didn’t have a lot to show for it.
Some of this was due to my inability to make solid choices and decisions about where to go, what to do, who to be. I tended to make soft decisions or half-choices to avoid messing it all up. The upside, I thought, was that I could change if I saw I needed to make a change.
The downside, however, was that because I made no solid decisions or choices, I left myself…