The Power Of Not Worrying About What They Think

You can’t control what they think, can you?

Photo by Vitaly Gariev on Unsplash

When I was a child, my parents got divorced. Because I was an especially sensitive child, this made me question my fault in my parent’s separation. Despite therapy, I managed to cut myself off from a large number of emotions until many, many years later.

I was a ginormous geek as a child. FYI — this has not changed at all, I’m still a ginormous geek. This, coupled with my Jewish heritage and growing up in the Scandawhovian Midwest, meant I was a head shorter than most of my classmates. I also had little to no athleticism, which meant my outlets were nerdy — choir, theatre, writing, reading, and other like pursuits.

My mom, in an effort to lessen my geek-cred, persuaded (coerced?) me to pierce my ear when I was 16. Most boys at that time did this as an act of rebellion and my mom knew this. Yet along the way, even as a huge nerd, I developed friendships and found my tribe.

This was great, as I struggled with friendships in my adolescent years. This did, however, come with a side-effect that still impacts me today. Despite comfort in my friendships, I still worry about what they think.

This moved beyond friendships to coworkers, associates, people who are in the same hobby I’m in but only…