Family is not always that which you are born into

Family can be the chosen people whom you love. These are the people for whom you would move mountains, who you know have your back, and who you confide in because they get you.

There is tremendous positivity in recognizing, acknowledging, and being a part of that family.

I am not disregarding the families we are born into. For the most part, they tend to be around from the beginning through the formative years and into the present. Parents, siblings, aunts and uncles, cousins and the rest can mean a lot to you.

However, in many cases, we grow apart from the family we are born into. Some people simply take paths and choose lifestyle options that the rest of their given family might not understand. Places to live, hobbies, friends we keep can be wildly different from our birth families.

Some people form communities among these people, and when those communities become particularly close, they turn into families. Non-traditional, to be sure, but family none-the-less. These people matter to us, and we want to be there for them and help them to grow, and they tend to do the same for us.

Acknowledging and celebrating your chosen family doesn’t lessen love for your birth family. In especial because love is the ultimate expression of abundance. You have love, and showing it for ANYONE whom you care about will build immense positivity.

Aspects of the world today get really dark. Seeking things we love and showing our appreciation for them can help bring spots of light into that darkness. Corny as that may seem, that makes it no less important and true.

Family is about being comfortable

For a lot of people, there is a certain discomfort in time with your birth family. This is not a specific negative thing, it’s mostly a matter of how you have grown apart from these people, taken alternate paths in life, and differences in viewpoints. Whether this is subtle or extreme, it can make given family gatherings uncomfortable.

Once again, this does not mean that you do not love them. It just means that they are not the source of comfort for you that most associate with the idea of family.

However, the chosen family you surround yourself with can be just that.

This is why they are the family you choose. Because of shared ideals, activities, interests, and other matters, you become more comfortable with one another. These families ban be of any size, shape, or make-up, ranging from a wide circle of friends to a close circle of lovers and combinations therein.

The important thing is recognizing that family is not just blood. Family is an evolutionary step from community, and it can be the people whom you feel most comfortable and connected with. Love is a broad, wide-open emotion, and the ultimate expression of abundance and positivity.

There is more than enough love to go around, so creating and enjoying a chosen family isn’t crazy, and doesn’t lessen relations with given family. When you are mindful of the thoughts and feelings that go into this, you can see how deeply powerful and empowering it can be.

Finding positivity is not hard, but it does require action

Knowing that family can be both given and chosen, you can recognize and acknowledge the power of the comfort and joy both forms of family brings you. When we open ourselves to the infinite abundance of love which family represents, and experience all the good this can draw to family given or chosen, we ultimately empower ourselves. When we feel empowered, we become more aware and mindful, and tend to spread that feeling to others around us. As such, we can build more positive feelings.

We can use the positive feelings this generates to dissolve negative feelings. When we eradicate negative feelings, we open up space to let in more positive feelings, and that is something we can be grateful for.

Gratitude leads to happiness. Happiness is the ultimate positive attitude. An attitude of gratitude is a positive attitude that begets even more good energies, and that is always worthwhile.

Originally published at on April 22, 2019.

Written by

I am a practitioner of mindfulness, positivity, philosophy, & conscious reality creation. I love to inspire, open minds, & entertain.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store