Just because you were born into a certain circumstance, raised in a given environment, got the education that you did, and hold the job you hold, you are not trapped. Fate is not written in stone.
You have the power to change your fate.
People tend to want to believe in fate because it means that they have a purpose. Fate means there has to be a reason, and purpose, to living your life.
So if there is no fate, how can there be any reason?
The simple answer is because you are here.
The long answer is because you, in your purest base energetic form, decided to occupy the meat suit you call your body and enter this world in this time in order to experience life.
Life is not dictated by fate. You have the power to choose what your life can and will look like.
Maybe you are currently dissatisfied with who and what you are. That’s ok, it happens, it’s a perfectly human thing to experience. But you only remain there for as long as YOU believe you must. So if you have had enough and want to change your life, take action and change your life.
Mindfulness begins the journey
The first thing anyone has to do to escape what they believe to be their fate is to become more mindful. How? Be being in the present, right here and now, and getting aware of your thoughts and feelings. What you are thinking and how and what you are feeling make up your overall mindfulness. Thoughts and feelings inform you about where you are, and from there to choose where to go.
Becoming mindful opens you up to influencing and possibly controlling your thinking and feeling in the now. Believing in fate denies choice, and puts your subconscious in control. When that happens, you go about your life half in the dark, because you are not fully aware of your here and now.
I have done this myself. When I lost sight of where I was in the now, and allowed past thoughts, feelings and actions make me feel bad about mistakes I made and opportunities missed — or — thoughts, feelings, and actions to avoid a fear and anxiety about a future outcome — I didn’t get where I desired to be and found myself at a crossroads. Decision paralysis tended to be there with me.
Indecision is borne of a lack of mindfulness. When you do not recognize your thoughts and feelings in the here and now, you close off the number of choices and decisions available to you. This tends to manifest as indecision.
By becoming more mindful of what is going on inside your head, you open yourself up to creating your life how you desire for it to be. But thought and feeling alone are not enough. Once you have gotten a better idea of these, from thoughts and feelings you need to take intentional actions.
Intentional actions belong to you, and only you
If you need more proof of how fate does not dictate your life, consider this: When you take intentional action, you are the one acting upon what you know. How you think and feel are wholly within your unique perception of the universe.
I don’t know what you want to do with your life. You could tell me your entire life story, and I would still only partially know what it is you are after. Why? Because I can’t get inside your head with you. Your perception of the universe belongs entirely to you, and nobody else.
When you are mindful of your thoughts and feelings, you open yourself up to taking more intentional actions. Intentional action is an action with specific focus on the outcome of the action. It’s not the same as acting just to put yourself in motion — it moves you with focus and purpose.
Intentional action, I would argue, is further proof that fate isn’t driving the bus. Why? Because if you possess this ability to choose and to direct your life, how can anyone other than you be directing your life?
I spent a long time with control issues. Whatever the situation was, I wanted to take charge and be in control. Most of the time this was pretty benign, but there were times along the way that it was a bit insidious.
It was also kind of ironic. I wanted to be in control but wasn’t being mindful of exactly what I was thinking and feeling. Thus, I also wasn’t taking intentional actions that would land me anywhere I really wanted to be. Instead, I got involved in uninspiring relationships, lackluster jobs, and developed some less-than-helpful habits.
Even after I managed to make use of mindfulness and conscious reality creation to speed my healing after being severely injured, I still continued on much as I had before. It wasn’t until almost another decade passed before I started to understand that real control was all in my head.
This has nothing to do with fate and outside forces of that ilk having control. They simply don’t. What it does come down to, however, is understanding that while you can direct your life and make choices and decisions to impact how you live, what you actually can control is limited.
What do YOU control?
You are the only thing within your own control. That ranges from inside to outside. You can control how you look by changing your hairstyle and color, weight loss/gain, muscle loss/gain, piercings, tattoos, and so on.
Inside your head, you have ALL the control. What and how you feel, what and how you think are entirely yours to influence. Control in many respects ignores variables that will impact what you think and feel. Because of that, it always begins with influence. You can influence your thinking and feeling, which in time can allow you to control reactions and actions.
Nobody but you chooses what you do when you do it. Fate is not anything more than an abstract idea removing influence and control from YOU. But when all is said and done, your life is in your hands.
I know that this can be challenging. You are bombarded by ideas of outside influences, be it God or gods, the Muses, the Fates, or some other omnipotent power that has written out your life story somewhere beyond your seeing. That’s just not the way it is. You and I have the power of decision and choice, and as such, there is no fate but what you make for your life.
Worth and deserving
Last but not least — you do not need to be someone special, from a certain class or environment, or whatever other factor you can think of to choose your life paths. You are worthy and deserving of making your own choices. Why? Because you are here.
If you have any fate at all, that fate is to make choices — or not — to direct the life you live. That is how you become who you most desire to be, and that begins with mindfulness of thoughts and feelings, then intentional actions to set it all in motion.
You can do it. If I can do it, so can you. It is not always going to seem that way, but that doesn’t lessen that truth. Go for it, and make those choices and decisions that feel like they will get you where you desire most to be.
What fate would you choose for yourself?
You are worthy and deserving of using your mindfulness to find and/or create the reality in which you desire to live. When all is said and done you matter, and you get to make your own fate.
Originally published at http://titaniumdon.com on July 10, 2019.