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You Are Looking to Make a Connection
Whether or not you acknowledge it, you are looking for something. I believe that something is connection.
For a long time, I had a personal theme song. It resonated with me because it spoke to me of my quest to figure out who I wanted to be, what I wanted to do, who I wanted to be with, and so on.
It was much less about the big, overarching picture of life, the Universe, and everything — and much more focused on my present, immediate needs.
The song? U2’s I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For. This was my mantra for probably a good 2 decades.
The right job? Couldn’t find it. The right home? Wasn’t feeling it. The right path in life? No clue. The right relationship? Ask anyone who knew me in my 20s and 30s, and they will tell you all about the insanity that was my lack of commitment and frequent missteps in dating.
No matter what I did, nothing satisfied me. The grass was always greener — even though I had no clue what was on the other side of the wall. I just knew I had not found — and subsequently could not find — what I was looking for.
What was lacking? For me, it was rooted in the fear of missing out, fear of failure, fear of success, and ultimately getting abandoned for being…
